It’s part of our human nature to need connections to others, that sense of belonging which at a deeper level increases our sense of security and safety. Sometimes we can get that from our family, but more commonly now (by choice or circumstance) we rely on our friendships to fulfill that need – because we can choose our friends, right? But do we?
When you look at those you call your friends, how many did you choose, and how many chose you, or by circumstance fell into being part your life? The most wonderful friendships can blossom by accident, but we can also get locked into more toxic or tiresome relationships just as easily. You know the ones – the friends who are super needy or critical or superficial – that you spend time with and end up feeling more drained, inadequate or unhappy than you did before. And like a partner, it’s harder to find the right one when you are with the wrong one.
To me a good friend is one that makes me laugh, shares common interests including travel, and can comfortably give me support and nudges as appropriate, but most of all, someone I can just be me with – not the coach, not the successful speaker or businesswoman, just me, warts ‘n all.
How about you? What’s important about friendship to you? Do you need someone who can talk for hours on the phone with you? Or someone to party with, kids free? Someone to talk business or babies with? And where do you find your best friends?
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