You Can Disagree And Both Be 100% Right

Next time someone insists he is right, when you know he’s not, remember two things:

1. He is right.
2. Him being right does not make you wrong.
3. You can both be right while holding opposing views.

That’s probably not what you learnt in childhood, at home and at school, but the reality is, we each have our own version of world.  We create our individual reality by the way we filter out the information coming in through our senses*.  No one else has exactly the same values, memories, beliefs and experiences filtering information as you, so no one has exactly the same reality.

You experience it every day in many small ways:  when someone orders something from the café display you hadn’t noticed; when your colleague spots the good looking man that happily married you hadn’t seen in the room; when you hear your child yelling before anyone else notices; and when no one else notices that plant dying for lack of water while you’re away.

So you are both right in your own realities.  Being comfortable in that, feeling secure in your own personal identity, opens up opportunities for calm negotiation for common ground.  It’s quite liberating as you can stop fighting to prove yourself right, or them wrong, and use all that energy for creatively sourcing options for moving forward.

So when you catch yourself feeling hurt or frustrated, asking, “How can she say that? I wouldn’t.” or “How can he do that? I wouldn’t.” or “How come he doesn’t do that for me? I’d do it for him.”  Just remember, the answer is always, “Because s/he is not me.”  No blame, no emotional charge. Then, knowing and accepting that, you can move forward to work out a solution, or simply move on.

Where can you apply this in your own life – at home and at work?

* Learn more about this in “The Face Within: How to Change Your Unconscious Blueprint”